2016

Tuesday, March 22: It's already past quad witch. I'm at about 3.5 billlion YTD.

Friday, March 11, 2016: It is a week before Quadruple Witching. We were hedged flat as we could, but as the volatility lessens, the balance has been changing.

The overall picture is here:

Next week will be VIX expiration, then all hell will break loose as usual. There is an FOMC Meeting, so lots of Fed jiggery pokery on Wednesday after VIX expires for March. We will see. It is a full calendar.

Thurs, March 3, 2016: Even keeping a flat hedge is difficult in this volatile environment. VIX remains artificially low, 16.7 to 17, and option premiums do not reflect true value. A rally over the past three days has petered out on speculation of a Fed rate hike skip this month, but recently good economic news The S+P 500 futures are around a 1980 average now.

The main takeaway is that if I can think of this, it is probably being done somewhere. Looking at the resumed performance of financials, it looks like great minds think alike, or fools seldom differ. You'll have to make that call. I still have a $2B spot this year to pay back. The new year crush was hard.

Thurs, Feb 25, 2016: I have it back up. February was an awful month. ToS now requires Java 8 from Oracle. I had the old Java, and thought it wouldn't update any more. Here is how it stands after a rare three days up on the S+P.

Looking at he S+P options, the shorts outweigh the longs by 5 to one, so it is a historically crowded trade to the downside with futures now at 1950 recovering from 1812 or so weeks ago. Sentiment is mixed, but still forecasting flat or worse for the future. They said this is the largest short interest in history on the S+P 500, so they aren't really believing the mini rally will continue off that dip. Only time will tell.

Saturday Jan 30, 2016: Have to shut it down for medical reasons here. Unable to keep on top of it all. It may still be going, and may be even up a little with the S+P and fuel rising. I just have to close it all out now.

If you have your health, you could try the same thing. I found ToS from an ad years ago, and looked into it back in the old days before it was TD. That was before my options lost buying power prints, citing "split position." TD said they would get option trading in Canada, but they never did. You had to go to the TD Ameritrade side to do that. I tried IB, but developed a palsy making it difficult to control the mouse. It did not have enough to mimic my trades also. So that is what happened to me there.

Sunday Jan 24, 2016: It got worse, but that was close to scraping the bottom of the barrel. The whole thing is oil. It has such a pro-con to the economy weight wise, and has so much hedged weight, the little fish, equities, have to go with the flow. We are a worldwide oil based civilization, and that was proof. I intentionally tried to ignore oil to hedge against it, but obviously not enough. Money has hung its hat on oil since Rockefeller Jr. was poopin' yellow. This is after a readjustment, but I would need a lot more downside prevention to stop that slide. Lessons learned.

I have a 2 Billion float that I borrowed from the Fed. 0.25 % apparently. I used to work in oil before I got hurt. It seemed like a good short hedge then for me. You can bet there will be a lot of longs on it if you dare call bottom. Oil is getting near oversold territory now. Still, hedgers are bound to carry this price forward for consumption. S+P may be financial king, but oil is the main world growth driver. Sequestered solar energy. It's how it all works. Everybody else hedges too and there is no relief. Too crowded... for now. Income fund makers I feel your pain.

Be careful what you wish for, methinks. lol

Weds Jan 20, 2016: It is officially a bear market now. The short side has been too crowded.

Fri Jan 8, 2016. Unprecedented first opening down week in history. S+P Futures touched 1910. Holding the broken hedges in the overwhelming down trend. Gold reflects a geopolitical shock component, but energy is still down. Jobs were up, signalling a suspected continuation of interest rate tightening, and touching off yet another late day sell off. We are down a few months to start with a ten percent correction possible. I saw WTI 32.89. Commodities are a major component of the Canadian Economy, and it is reflected in our low valued currency. There is no carrot there hedging forward commodity production. Generally, it is an across the board value reduction now. Who would think we would look to December as the good old days?

That is where we are headed as the hedges can't keep up. China is unpredictable to add to the malaise like 1980 all over again.

Weds, Jan 6, 2016: The year is off to a bad start, and the hedges are broken with the downside crowded. Monday opened with a large loss, followed by today with a dip to 1970.5 on S+P March Futures. What can you do, but try to get that second dip after 1990 Monday? North Korea claims to have a hydrogen bomb, so that cratered it today, along with oil WTI hitting $33.77. China is experimenting, and failing, cushioning the market. It's all bad today, so maybe an inflection is all I can guess.

The word from the Fed is stay the course with interest rates for now. This will look to be an interesting year if we can go by what we've seen so far. There is opportunity in those crowded hedges, but on the other side possibly.

Thurs, Dec 31, 2015: It faded he last two days of the year as predicted, but the downside appears to have been crowded. With a drop from 2055-2015 to end the year, ES March Futures, here is where it sits at about 6 EST.

So we held the $10B YTD line anyway, even with the crowding, with the S+P giving up 20 handles. The Upside actually still made money after settling. Every kid and his dog was calling for a correction. Now we start a New Year.

Tues, Dec 22, 2015: It is a tough spot, rolling this behemoth into next year. We've had a couple days where S+P ripped to 2035 March ES Futures, after a two day dip to close the December Quad Witch fourth quarterin a trainwreck. I loaded up on the long side during the Thurs/Fri Expiry crash, and attempted to hedge that in at the close today. We are still long.

The overall picture is sitting here.

There is a big up rip after the Bell, now about +472M, so the weight is still long. I tried to balance it, but there will be a lot more to go to flatten an apparent Santa Claus rally. P/L YTD will drop to Zero on New Year's of course. It's that quirky calendar year versus fiscal year thing.

What will 2016 shape up like as the Treasury Bonds start their march back to normal? Nobody is sure, including the Fed. Easy money is gone for the short term, but at least time value may be restored somewhat. I achieved trying to keep commissions at 0.1% of Buying Power if anything, but missed the mark trying for a billion a month. The weight would be unrealistic, as it approaches Market Maker status of entire exchanges. It provides a unique insight into the internals and particularly how the whole market is hedged in an ongoing and sustainable basis, albeit not at as many price points. I notice when this account feels pain, it gets into the conversation on CNBC. They feel it too on the NYSE floor.

Fourth Quarter 2015

Mon, Dec 21, 2015: There was a decline in the two days leading up to the Quad Witch, after which the market was extremely oversold. I went long, and my options were exercised that way. I'll have to look to rebalance it to bring it back closer to flat.

It always gets out of sorts around the calendar year end. Maybe this year it won't. Maybe I will speculate and let it ride a bit, but I can bag theta on the balancing options when and if the S+P gains about 85 handles or so from ES 2015-16 where it sits, ironically. Interest rates may keep it flat, but the Fed may relax yet, and that will show up here.

Weds Dec 16, 2015: Finally a rate hike. Here is the initial reaction after the 2 PM Eastern statement.:

After the dust settles, the Close was here... I kept it hedged with an eye to expiration slightly bullish, but that may change to squeeze a bit more theta out, and roll some positions forward. I'll likely try a flat hedge through Christmas as that will be where the crowd seeks solace. Certainty has been somewhat restored in the Big Picture by removing another regular source of Uncertainty.

The Statement pointed out the risk of shocks to the system, so it's back to good old Yellow Journalism trying to swing it short. They didn't guarantee it intentionally, so still a bit of volatile Fed uncertainty left on the bones.

Mon, Dec 14, 2015: It is Expiration of the Dec VIX tomorrow, then quadruple witching Friday. The Federal Reserve meets tomorrow and Wednesday. We were walloped Friday and today when the short side couldn't keep up. Like Dennis Gartman, we tried to hedge flat, but a lot of people were caught flat footed.

Tues, Dec 1, 2015: Here is where the close was last night.

Thanksgiving week was nothing to really be thankful about. The options were cash settled with no option to take share delivery by the new software.

Later on, they pointed out it was a hard year for hedge funds. That must have been on paper in their back offices. I hedged for a flat S+P since July. If it varies plus or minus from that, I increase the monthly dollar allocation. It has mostly reverted after that August September downturn. I have to reload monthly. It was a 22.5 point up day, but I had it hedged, gaining mainly from a relax in volatility. Then I sell volatility when it rises back up. I'm bracing for a Fed meeting where they are expected to hike rates, but they may not, staying the course and deferring to 2016.

That might all get walloped if one way or the other due to the uncertainty hit. The numbers have become too big to steer like a supertanker with an undersized rudder. I'm back to the same wait and see mode I was in back in September, and no rate hike came from the Fed.

Sat, Nov 21, 2015: November Option Expiration:

There you have it. About $430M and change. High uncertainty with not as much volatility premium on time as there should be. Blame a Fed painted into a ZIRP corner, and Paris Terror. Still trying to keep the balance flat with minimal contango on the options to work with. The convexity of the futures curve is broken with a rate hike baked in before next month's Quad Witch.

Mon, Nov 2, 2015: The calendar month starts with an up day post FOMC, so I sold more hedge units against volatility increases. I sold both sides to bag some theta actually, but if the wheels fall off, hopefully we will still have some cash to buy the big dip by flat hedging the rip close today.

Option generally don't update after hours, while our exercised direct holds do. I play all options European and hold them to expiration when delta and gamma cut out to zero or one as the case may be. There's 18 days theta to go on them.

Later in the evening... it settled down over $17 B.

Fri, Oct 30, 2015: Our flat hedge ended up a bit.

The big picture on Mon, Nov 2 looks better by lunch time.

The strategy has been to reduce our overall short volatility strategy by hedging it with proxies. An example of short volatility would be long S+P Futures.

Fri, Oct 16, 2015: Hi. Your friendly VIXen whore here. I can deliver! The old Gal comes through in the end.

 

Things were slowin' down on the corner so I advertised. "Sexy broker needs good fzckin' - Options welcomed!" I'm considering Kijiji. I've a few irons in he fire.In the meantine, I'nm the only fzck in the world without worms stem to stern. Even did a sweep with Wormwood. Already did a weekend on the shztter with black walnut.. It's getting hard to find a good wormless fzck when they blow on average a pint o' spitters.


Monday, Oct 12, 2015: Columbus Day: Canadian Thanksgiving:

 

A lot to be thankful for. The hedges have reverted back to balance, and we forge on. There have been some fundmental futures inflection points passed, but we're on it. Don't you wish you could back up time? Well, this is the next best thing. Past performance is not a guarantee, but a pretty gawdam good good shot at future results now. Wace will be graduating from university shortly. I home school him <3 R. He runs this hedge now. I am merely his slave, picking up toys, correcting typos, and cooking. Teehehehe...

Friday, Oct 2, 2015: It has been a bumpy ride since the September expiration.

It finally broke back positive here, but it wasn't always that way. Volatility has crushed tracking of the ETF's through contango. You try to make that work for you, then they reverse split the ETF to adjust for losses, but the software will not track the split correctly, clinging to the presplit valuation. The S+P is back to 20th century numbers 1940 Era from 19th century Civil War numbers. The debt limit looms large, but it is all a part of the never ending inflation carrot and stick that has reduced growth to inflation itself. The bond limit where interest payments will topple the whole mess is nigh, trapping them into a "zirp." Everybody may be a millionaire yet. Re skinning the software isn't going to solve that pickle, and they didn't fix the split bug, but they did a re skin anyway. The "light" skin is far too eye burning from an LED monitor.

Sept 18th expiration tanked miserably. Immediately after, Monday 21st tanked even more miserably to record low valuation losses since the 80's. Volatility VIX is back to living in the 20's. The hedges broke or flattened there, recording a sustained loss until just today at the end. October has been a historically bad month, and the acceleration of shortening days adds to the overall malaise after October option expiration. It affects peoples' thinking. SAD Seasonal Affected Disorder. We know that market dollar weight sets the balance, but it is a tough call. The Bears have a lot invested in negative news for every rally. October Week Three will be interesting when all the stored up ghouls and goblins come out to play. Then there is the Calendar month change. The Federal Reserve can't decide when to put interest on money again. Now some are looking at 2016 to try and call the seasonal employment rise for an opportunity. Will Santa have lumps of coal or a new silly toy sensation? So much is baked in during October, and it has a past.

The Middle East now has Russia throwing its hat in the ring. Some say another Cold War. The news is it has never been cold there.

Third Quarter

Thurs, Sept 17, 2015: We just let it ride. The past two weeks jostled with volatility until VIX expiration this past Tuesday, with Quadruple Witching tomorrow.

Half the hedges are deep in the money, with the out of the money side zeroed, so it will be anybody's guess as to how tomorrow will end. The last hour of trading gave up over 20 S&P Handles.


Thurs, Sept 3, 2015: It's a wild whipsaw ride. The hedge metric has changed because the second order derivatives of volatility are more variable, leading to wild swings.

It has wobbled from 5 to 2 billion on the YTD in a matter of days. Different sides of the traditional hedges are even disconnected more, like they are trying to shake us. They can't believe how futile it is, resorting to fraud with real money. We have a front row seat to it all.


Mon, Aug 31, 2015: The S+P lost big since just before last options expiration. The hedge balance fell apart as the ratio became variable. The short side became quite crowded as the volatility rose to more traditional, and even unprecedented levels, with VVIX topping 211.

 

 At one point, we were over 4B YTD, but lost it all in the crash. The normal hedge balance has not returned.

Thurs, July 30, 2015: There was the Fed meeting minutes with no press conference, and it ended flat yesterday.

We no longer have that silly N/A on the VIX. Boring. We are now half way to the quad witch of September. Yawwwwn.

I am amazed at the complacency that sets in with extremely complex ventures, such as the Apollo Missions. By 13, nobody even watched, a mere 10 months after the First Lunar landing, the greatest achievement of mankind. They did not even carry the telecast on the networks prior to the explosion. Perhaps this is like that; The next Fed meeting may restore time value of debt at inception. Now the S+P is in a lazy inflationary residual climb, close to a top. Perhaps this is the calm before the storm of forced growth, and return to reality of stock valuations sans inflation.

Second Quarter

Tues, June 30, 2015: OK, technically it is the 3rd quarter now, but bear with me... Here is the current snapshot of the Most Stolen Signal in The World...

Why? "Because that's where the money is!" lulz (; Rx. <3




\Mon, June 15, 2015: We are closing on The Witch within the week. In the evening,

With the VIX expiring tomorrow, suffice to say we have the hairy eyeball on it.

Fri, May 29, 2015: There was another software bug, and again regarding share splits not correctly showing the post split value x new number of shares.

 

So I liquidated that side of the hedge, leaving the negative balance on the left above, while leaving us in a temporary large profit showing by 302 million bucks. I am presently un-hedged, but will slap it back on to reflect the new post split CUSIP numbers. I'm losing faith in the software though. It never used to do that. Likewise, they way they play with the convexity in Chicago, while also omitting key metrics regarding certain options, leading to the "N/A", also raises eyebrows. There seems to be a steady decline since Thinkorswim was a user oriented software back in 2008. Caveat Emptor.

Fri, May 1, 2015: Another month, and a flat one. There were real interesting skims going on, but it is mostly just a bug when certain things get reverse splits, and the calculation doesn't  reflect the new post split price with the same number of units.

I rebalanced and wound up about $1.3B less invested, as we had too bearish a weight I figure. We kept losing large on up days, only to come back when we had a large down day yesterday. So I rebalanced it for a slighter loss on those by taking a lot of bear insurance weight off. Option time premium also seems a lot lower than it used to be, with higher volatility now the norm, almost backwardating to a sure fire long straddle situation. They're setting themselves up for a real ass kicking if that is the case, but we all built this market. We don't have ZIRP to cover our ass when it all comes apart, and they still do.

Wednesday Apr 1, 2015: April Fools! We are not fooling though. The manipulation of volatility ETF's has failed on the bank side when they or a parasite hacker outed themselves yesterday. The Boss baited them with our little account here, confounding them by winning all the time. Of course, since we played by the rules, hedging, the only way they could win was to cheat. They crushed themselves as truth won out amplified when they tried to skim only part of a hedge. Their losses were also amplified.

Tuesday Mar 31, 2015:  Jack and Jill went up the Hill with 25 Bucks apiece. Jill came down with half a Ben Franklin. <3 Yes, it is Mother Robin and little Wace back in the saddle here. The Boss was called away on a medical emergency; His brother has been in a *strange* incident in the mountains. Lots of that going around. ;)

Now cut that out Boss! We all know you fucked the S+P Volatility ETF's today. Braggart! I bet he lost our lunchbox fund for lil' Wace...

I see my hedge is still intact sort of... Boss! Did you break their bank again? What is the Buying Power???? Not Applicable? WTF???

Well, I have to scoot. Lil' Wace needs a Wahmbulance. He just wants to suck my tit I think. That usually calms him right down.... Wace!!! He uses his tongue on it! Have you got an Oedipus Complex or something? Oh well, later. My my.... Ooooh! <3

Happy New Year?

Thursday Mar 12, 2015:  It was actually flat till yesterday, but it looks like the Bank defences are starting to crumble against several billion dollars hedging them in like a Figure 4 wrestling hold of their own design...

The last week until the Quad Witch should show just how Futile their resistance is. lol

Thursday Mar 5, 2015: There are a couple weeks to go for expiration. We invested  about a billion in options a few weeks back. there was a rise around the FOMC Chit Chat with Janet and Congress. There was yesterday's close...

Things have flattened out. At the close...

What this tells me is that while we have invested a lot of risk capital, our time value hasn't been paying off... yet. The last two weeks to The Witch will have to settle out the premium still riding. We are flat hedged intentionally. Miss Banks and Wace will return shortly. He weighed 16 pounds 4 ounces already! She has been a little delayed getting back understandably... she had an episiotomy so Lil' Wace wasn't a Bullethead... He has a Big Head...

It's an hour or so later. You can see it is a weekly battle... but will pickup. Stay tuned...Meanwhile, we still work on bztchin' boomers inc. in the healthcare realm.

Monday Feb 23, 2015: Evening: The settlements are all exercised now. Here is where we stand going into the March Quadruple Witching month.

We can live with that. February saved us after a pretty lackluster start to the year in a virtually sideways market and where we were still biased for at least half the growth experienced in QE world. The market wasn't convinced; It biased to all previous growth attributed to QE, so basically from inflation only. Looked good on Paper, but flat in real terms. Better than expected February earnings woke them up. Lower fuel prices will now come into play, freeing up income to other sectors. Scott Adams even weighed in on the market. ;)

For the record, our strategy is to be on the other side of everybody's trades. We have a lot less overhead than the brokerage.

Friday Feb 20, 2015: Expiration Day. Here is where it sits now as I already have put on the options for next month... There will be some exercised positions from this month to be settled yet after Monday afternoon close.

This year has been a battle with volatility post QE as volatility has jumped to an over-corrected state. We have adjusted for the new normal and rode it out, but going forward things will be more subdued until the banks realize that there is no way to beat us without beating themselves up even worse, or simply resorting to fraud and theft. We will see.


Thurs Evening, Feb 12, 2015: Another rough week with Russia and the Ukraine, smattered with Greek instability. The Greek electorate  has leaned towards defaulting their bond debt, so they are committing fiscal suicide. The Euro community will QE it away dragging the whole mess down.

We have a week to go for Feb Expiry. Perhaps we can roll in advance if there is a volatility spike between now and then as there sometimes is, but better than forecast earnings for majors like AAPL could foretell a break out of the flat doldrums we have had since the beginning of the year.

VIX Expiry comes before normal monthly expiration this cycle. It will be at the next Tuesday Close.

Thurs Evening, Feb 5, 2015: Miss Banks is preggers, so I'll fill in... We really haven't had much for up days. The Bear sides of the hedges are getting crowded, so any up day moves our bottom line like it is on steroids. There will be a massive settlement in our favour in a couple weeks consequently I suppose, but until then it is nail biting time.

I cleared off a lot of the previous settled expiration holdings, but have billions more I could clean off the slate and up our liquidity with. I have ignored it as designed. We wanted to build it to minimize trades. We have blown only about $561 K in commissions so far this year which is on target that way.

I have been busy anyways with my biotech startup. A 1% reduction in chronic disease would have an economic benefit worth about $1 trillion, or $500 billion 2006 US Dollars. This has the ability to reduce chronic disease by way more than that, so understandably it deserves a lot more attention. We are still struggling to make a billion so far this year here.

Lil' Wace may still be born with a diamond encrusted platinum spoon in his mouth... We'll have to see in a couple weeks. We bagged a free $110 million from a reverse 10:1 split on a NASDAQ ETF position we put on last year, held the negative exercise, and it didn't show up until it was liquidated this year. That little bump helped and Wace won't have to get hand me downs.

Mon, Jan 26, 2015:We have been away for a while. Getting back, I see that we took a big hit at expiration, below S+P 2000, and have since recovered. It's about a half hour until the close.

This what it looked like the Monday after expiry a week ago... ugly. Time heals most wounds in hedge world.

We have rebounded over half a billion dollars from that ditch by rebalancing to the new high volatility reality. We did that by cashing out assignments on our options and rolling into February positions. We want to profit from the excessive theta that high volatility generates on options when it relaxes and/or the option on the underlying expires, be it in or out of the money. Like the heading says, the happiness has been questionable this year so far. Earnings season only exacerbates that with all the dividend bagging craziness. March ES sits at about 2049.




Fri Jan 9, 2015: There is One Week left to go in the fiscal month. At Lunchtime, the market is back down moderately with ES bobbling around 2040...

While showing positive numbers for the year, we still have a relatively bad fiscal  month. This is due to the large drop at the end of the previous year during last Wednesday afternoon, New Year's Eve, as many funds took a large amount off the table. We ended down about $250 million in Blue Column 1. Today there were some moderately bad numbers, and there was a hostage crisis in Paris. VVIX is at 101.74 pointing to the Hedger's Nemesis, Increasing Volatility, as the culprit. So I reckon we are up only $200 million since New Year's Eve, an awful performance for us. 6:30 pm approaches... Along with Earnings Week next week... ES dropped to 2033.50






Thurs Jan 8, 2015: A rally appears to be underway. After overnight and then the "Up" opening, it rose for a solid hour...

During the morning and afternoon, it started to lose some steam affording us an opportunity to reinvest some cash to rebalance hedges, although we are weighted decidedly Bullish. So far this year, Volatility has returned to the Markets reaffirming our assertion that QE kept it artificially low, and enabled us to ride it like a rented mule. At 1 PM EST,

Looking above on the Blue Line, the numbers are Respectively P/L from Opening Positions, Daily Profit/Loss, and Buying Power Effect of Open Positions. After the Close at 8 PM,

We are back into the Green from Opening our positions after a decidedly bad month with two distinct dips. S+P Futures (ES) are presently in the 2053 range. There is a week left to go until Option Expiration this month. It is getting harder to make a buck in the hedge business as the market feels out this new Post QE reality, and the wheels fall off in the oil business.

Weds Jan 7, 2015: The Boss Stale Dated that last post! I have been on the mend for nearly a week!

We are still under water. It has been a Horrific Week! The S+P went into the 1900's! Now it is only 2016 ES Futures! We have made Zero Trades this year! The Boss tried to explain why I fell ill. He says RoundUp Weedkiller is in everything we eat now, and there is No Cure! Well, unless you believe that silly thing he is working on. He also fancies himself an Artiste of sorts... He contacted Mr. Brainwash with his latest Creation!

I have an idea! Let's use the Banks Phone! Banksy must be out there Somewhere!

It went to message... "Brother Dearest... It's me, Robin <3 xoxo as if you didn't KNOW! Teehehehe! Mom says pickup your CD's or they all go to the Thrift... and Call Me!" <flush!> That should get a response...

It is 20 minutes to go until the close. The day was wildly volatile, indicative of a final bottom possibly to this Awful Week. VVIX remains around 109. but has been steadily decreasing all day. ES mafe 2017.5 as of now. It made 2024 earlier. Let's wait for the Closing Bell.

SPX settled at about 2025.90. By 7:30 PM... ES 2021.50 , and...

Fri Jan 2 2014: Happy New Year. At 6:30 AM EST, it is The Boss, and here is the picture... New years Eve we lost about 100 million, but we got it back. There was a large selloff for tax purposes of hedge funds. Today and next week they will selectively buy it all back and then some.

I have been working over the break from medical school/engineering, and trying to heal what ails Miss Banks. I will have to invent a cure because one does not exist yet. Well, neither did this 380% hedge fund. Miss Banks thinks I have Lost my Marbles! Well, in honour of her, here is my temporary logo... comprised of MIT, UBC, and the soon to be Defunct MON logos...

I missed the New Year's Close because I was at the bank. They were all too happy to help me, given my history, and no personal guarantee necessary! Sorry, this IPO is cancelled.  I guess they want some of my business back. :) At 9 AM, things are picking up... Banksy is snoring, and on the mend.

After the opening, the options are kicking in.

But the selloff continued, while Volatility relaxed. Miss Banks stands vindicated with her prescience. I made her some Chicken Soup, with allegedly Organic Chicken... At 7:23 PM...

It is still moving though with our direct shorts after hours.



Weds Dec 31 2014: It is the last day of the year. It is The Boss here.... Miss Banks is sick as a dog from a fast food GMO binge with my sister and is still "Sittin' on tha Toilet!" The audio is atrocious coming out of there! It is 10:30 EST.

Perhaps she will understand my fascination with BioTech these days now. I have a cure for that one. (adjusts gas mask) No sulfur deficiency there yet though.... give her a couple more hours... lol. I was gonna dump her, but kinda feel sorry fo' da po' bztch now....

Let's look at how Monsanto (MON) is faring these days. It went from a July 7, 2010 low of 44.61 to 128.79 and now 121.15. There will be a short storm coming on demonstrably one of perhaps the most evil corporations to ever exist. After all, they hid PCB's, Dioxins, Several Superfund Sites, Agent Orange, and now RoundUp/GMO Ready Death. Miss Banks is just another puny death about to happen at their hands, but I take it as a Challenge now. I watched 6 friends die of brain cancer this year alone, and all traced to MON Products. I also have some secret information on their clandestine human toxicity testing from the 40's, 50's, 60's, and 70's. You will see.

This also the end of the Calendar Year. There will be a lot of Tax Adjusting going on to split liquidations over two Calendar Years and minimize Capital Gains. Indeed, I am headed out to do some myself.


Tues Dec 30, 2014: The bell opening, rung by Art Cashin to mark 50 Years service at the NYSE, is flat...

Somebody please tell the Boss that this is a stable career like Art Cashin has. Just because he cured cancer today doesn't mean that the next person falling off the turnip truck won't do the same thing tomorrow, and he will wind up in a barrel! Think of little Wace!!! Oh dear! And Wace just punted my Kidney! I guess it is handy to have somebody involved in Healthcare in the Family... but think of the long term ramifications!? Ow! Wace has Hyperactivity issues too. It's like he is trying to bust out like that Alien movie! <Frapppp!> Oh, Wace, cut that out! The little bugger is taking advantage of that extra helping of Beans I had last night...

Speaking of beans, now the S+P is jumping around like a mexican jumping bean, but we are still flat. Maybe I am hedged too well. We have seen that before like back in August where we stayed flat until Expiration, and we got a huge positive settlement as all the options expired worthless from being way overvalued from Volatility. We were short all of those, and the greeks went to zero or 1 (delta), so we walked away with an enormous Windfall. Free Money! After showing the Boss, he put me in charge of the account. See "Not Quite Expired Yet!!!" after we went from 600 million to over ten times that year to date. I am a little "Hedge Hog." Teeehehehe!

It is 2 hours after the Close, so the number isn't right. I went town with the Boss' Sister, and we talked about how silly the Boss was about all this multibillion Pharmacrap. She works for Health Canada, or as we all know it, Monsanto. We ate buckets of geneticall modified weed free delicacies, and talked about all the people we knew who died young this week. Better them than us! Teeehehehe!

It looks like things are flat still. Oh well, they can pay me later. Options expire in 17 days, and then they all go to zero or Delta 1. They'll rue the day. xoxo <3 R.


Mon Dec 29, 2014: It was a rough Open after a wild Sunday Night on Futures, but it is at 2087 right now...

VIX climbed back over 16 at the open but subsided to 15.36 by 10:15 AM. I found out what The Boss has been busy doing. He is trying to get his Biotechnical Pharmaceutical startup off the ground, but it has been a tough slog. You cannot Crowd Source medical pursuits. He claims it is an instant Arthritis Cure. Really! Celebrex that doesn't work alone is $1 billion a quarter! I protested that that is only revenues but he claims THAT is why My Division is puny potatos comparatively! :( I am $1.5 B a quarter, cold hard cash, and damn good steamy comfy sex, but he thinks he has Celebrex clobbered! Plus it is being replaced by those risky biologic treatments daily! His thing has NO side effects! <sob!> I fret that He is going to dump me!!!

It was flatter than piss on a plate all day. Santa Claus and his Rally must be whacked out on Triptophane from a Turkey Overdose.

I want in on that pharmaceutical IPO. Am I an insider? xoxo <3 R.


Fri Dec 26. 2014: The Open

Later at Lunch...

Light volume I guess. Sony released and showed The Interview. Reviews are that it sucked, but nothing like plumping up that Christmas Turkey with a little free publicity. I can see Kim Jong Un's beef with the thing now... EVERYBody can! It was an awful movie!! Denizens sat through it as a patriotic duty, else they would have all left the steaming pile alone early. Many were left thinking God Bless America... Sony can go to Hell!

Meanwhile Obama carded 73! It was the other 9 holes where the wheels fell off; that score remains a State secret. The Secret Service detail would only bust out laughing when queried if the CiC had indeed broken 200!!! Rumour has it the GiC looked pooped after reportedly digging a divot from 10 to 18. He couldn't even lift a Pen, and He let the storied Phone go to Message. He drove Choom Force #1 straight into the Clubhouse and left in a huff. Owwch! Here is the Closing Bell... it will settle more though...

I used available dollars all day patching and balancing our hedges using options. After Hours they do not move after the Closing and Opening Bells. Thusly, we get strange balances over night, holidays, and the weekend versus direct held positions. All in a day's work for the astute hedger I suppose. ES Futures closed a half hour ago, and here is what we have.

There was a large clawback after 9 PM EST, but again options are closed, so we will get it back Monday. See you then! xoxo <3 R.

Weds Dec 24, 2014: It is a shortened trading day where crude oil is all the buzz; How low can it go as if that is a bad thing. Futures show $55 +/- a buck like they have so far this week. The settlement price is hard on the corporate planners though. Noting the date, the reindeer don't give a rat's patootie.

So the shortened day was great up until the bell where SPX finished 2081.88 Our hedge held up... Futures dove to 2078 after hours though...

I hope you have a Merry Christmas. We are having Whirled Peas for supper. My Favorite!!! xoxo <3 R.


Tues Dec 23, 2014: Well it started down a bit...
 

The Community Riot Organizer In Chief got another cop kill notch last night in Florida while at the 19th Hole in Hawaii. Hope and Change is kicking ass with Pen and Phone halfway round the world. Big Bird DeBlasio is about to check into psych. Republican brats all over are making up Bumper Stickers "Who d'ya wanna kill? When?" with bright Hammer and Sickle motif to slap on their Union Teacher's bumpers all night long before phoning the cops on them. Splendid! I guess they have learned their lessons well how to Organize against authority from the Top.

At 11 AM with the AWOL Commander peeling Pineapples, home sales numbers suck. We liquidated a bunch of extra positions to  get back towards sanity...

We got an adjustment for a reverse 10:1 split on one underlying security, JNUG, that we had shorted for ages and held. Sony clarifies that "The Interview" release is just delayed. They will get tight with The Cops to release it in a couple months instead. Of course in the last week liberals like those in Hollywood have got in tighter than ever with police "racist mofos" Brothers all over America from New York to Florida between organizing cop hating race riots Police Love Ins.

Low oil prices are fueling a boom. Finally some good news. Everything was negative on the news channels. I guess they are trying to ruin Christmas. Well, we simply won't let them! We are hedged in as best as we can for now. Three weeks and change to expiration. The Short Selling Grinch News Machine will fail we surmise. Do we care if it's one nation under godawful? Why is it a concern all of a sudden? I can have a smashing New Years where we can all defenestrate Boxing Week Special TV's from the Penthouse! Smashing! Literally! Look out below!

Sony has now decided to release the Interview anyways. A Liberal gutsy calculus; Ripping face off of a Mentally unstable nuclear armed dictator OR Sit here and face the Music from the Cops and the Ha><0rs? Wait a sec... Those are ALL about equally bad and now they all happen! Math wasn't their strong suit. Sony feels it hasn't got much left to live for anyways.

By 9 PM...

...as we Brace for a Jolly Sony Christmas.

Mon Dec 22, 2014: The last Quad witch of the year is behind us and the settlement is today. An early snapshot at 7 AM on Wall Street looked like this, but of course we have many option positions that will light up in 2.5 hours...

The real question is will we have a mixed market now that inflationary monetary policy is over. The Fed printed Bull Market is now gone. We have President Ebola ignoring the 1,400 cases the CDC is hiding from people, and golfing in Hawaii to make things look legit. Community Riot Organizers have NYPD Blood on their hands they can simply smear off onto the White House carpet. China has bravely taken on the greased turd that is Russia by backstopping the Ruble. Let's see how that goes...

Of course there is that silly story about the high school boy who gained $72 million trading securities. In the hedge world, we know this happens all the time, but he lied and the magazine reporting was left with egg on their face. All the ones asking me for interviews never make it past the SEC. We have an agreement; I don't tell how, especially to a reporter, and they leave me alone! <3 Oddly, a child with excruciating leverage would not pass that muster, but the reporting standards of New Yorker are that lax.

They also thump the tub for President Ebola I suppose, ignoring the fact that he was born out back of a whore house in Hawaii before it was a state. Apparently, American Voters are that stupid say President Ebola's Top Advisor(s) running the country. It will be just like some random idiot kiddie porn bastard child grew up to be President or something. This will be our Arbitration Opportunity going forward, elevating time value to excruciating levels as the legendary dumbasses slowly find out what we have known all along, the cranial back package of disbelief constipation relieves in their collective drawers, and our bank accounts, all at once. What do you think the chances are that the full movie of Ebola's Conception comes out before he leaves office? Does that look like a photographer's drop curtain being used as a dress here in 1953, 61 years ago as Ebola really looks forward to his 61st birthday? She appears to like hiding his stretch marks in all the reams of other newer pictures. At the Open,

I'm sorry, but I have been busy taking advantage of the morning shakeup putting on hedges I haven't used for months to make it interesting. It is about a quarter past 10 AM EST, and I hedged all our excess cash. Now I can celebrate Christmas unless we get more when the other exercised options get put to us as the day progresses. As we have seen in the past, that sometimes works out to be a substantial sum.

Back to the Big Picture. Now that Republicans ought to know the standard blackmail fare the Democrats had on Candidate Ebola, will they show they have a pair, or will it be the usual mono gonad-ed response? I am a Libertarian but have known since before he ran when I was a Girl Guide in high school, and it was all the rage of rumours we bandied about at sleep overs. "Don't have sex in movies before you are 12 or you could have a Presidential Bastard, be shacked up with some exchange student from Kenya in a botched coverup, and be killed by the CIA!" Every British girl knew that... At Lunch, the weight of problems turns the day into a grind.

The Riot Organizer In Chief has put his "Who do we wanna Kill?... When do we wanna kill 'em?" bullhorn down to putt. Everything is all Candy Canes and Sugarplums now in serene bullet proof limo processions. The Free Obama Phone and golf Cart hawkers have become oddly silent as crude languishes in the 50's, and President Ebola shatters Bush's Worst Approval Ratings. The Faithful, still blissfully ignorant, blame Bush for not setting it lower. Guffaw!!! Not a creature is stirring... Not even a DemocRAT! And it is another 3 days before that rotund sled pilot loads up with coal to bomb the lot of the bastards!

Rush Limbaugh was snuggled... Assured in his bed... He'd told you a Reindeer'd, Crap on Barack's Head!!! Sarah was up near Wasilla, Alaska... The Cop Killer In Chief was a Five Star Disasta'! "Barack is not a smart fella', ya know... So again, all'a ya dumbasses, 'I told you so!'" DemocRATs feverishly hung nooses all over... A huge Race Baiting Hoax would just let them Start Over!

I napped. I had other thimgs to do. It closed and I snapped it at 9 Eastern...